My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
