he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
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