Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
y did u give ur computer a hand job?
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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