So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
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