The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
