idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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