So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Randomize
