I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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