I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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