You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Randomize
