i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
