my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
