How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Randomize
