okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
