walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
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