He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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