Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Randomize
