I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
