I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
