I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
this must be what syphilis tastes like
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
