If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
