I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
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