wakey wakey hands off snakey
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
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