oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Who died my cat blue again?
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Randomize