is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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