Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
please come you make the beer taste better
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
When did angry sex become our thing?
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Randomize
