Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
You can't special order awesome
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
