This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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