it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
only if we run a train.
done.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
