very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Randomize
