So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
she looked like the before picture.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
