im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
