you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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