Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
