A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
She announced her abortion via fbk
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
