are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Randomize
