just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
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