Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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