his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
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