ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
