Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I checked into jail on foursquare
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
