I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
