Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
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