do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
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