He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
