My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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