i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize