im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
Randomize
