Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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