he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Randomize
